Peem.
Peem.
Peeem.
I am honking at you.
Which means you have to move.
Move to the left please or I might kill you.
I am doing drunken driving and hence, I am allowed to kill you.
It's part of the job description.
Allow me to introduce myself.
I am a professional drunken driver. I drive on pavements only and I honk at you when I'm bored and I ask you to move to the left. If you don't, I honk some more.
Peem. Peem. Peem.
The truth is, I'm not really drunk. I am only pretending to be drunk to get a job as a drunken driver.
Did I convince you?
You see, I am going to fail the boards and have no future and no money.
So I'm thinking of becoming a drunken driver.
The last time I checked, no qualifications are necessary.
I just need to be drunk.
I don't even need to know how to drive! ( Which works very well for me since I can't even balance a cycle)
Now suddenly, My life seems filled with possibilities.
:)